Only I Knew The Answer

I closed my eyes, ready for astral traveling again, with the key locked in both of my hands so tightly. Only longing for a visit, I did not want to get used to grace, for it does not exist in real life.

I was standing before the gate once again. Something was different, the gate seemed smaller. I was trying to analyze the negativity behind those wonders. It did not feel right. Why was I not magically swept off my feet, almost floating, feeling light-weighed? There was an unwelcoming vibe in the air;the kind you’d get when you deeply acknowledge that a person doesn’t wish you well. “Maybe the authentic owners of this forest are angry with me!” I thought, terrified, visualizing how unimaginably scary the creatures might look like, or how pleasantly alluring they might be.

For the first time, my steps were hesitant. I did not feel hypnotized like I usually do. I was expecting something, something that would stop me for coming here ever again. “Oh no” I pleaded.

There it was, another gate – the gate I knew, with studded pearls and colored gem stones. Standing before it I was, with the previous one behind me accompanied by its negative vibes. I was ready to take a step forward, to be dazzled !

By surprise, a familiar face appeared, one which I would consider hating. “What was she doing here? Standing before my euphoria?” My eyes were fixed on what I felt to be her invisible devil horns. As she got closer to me, there was a magnificent dusky aura surrounding her, chasing her as she took more steps towards me. I was scared and speechless, as she seemed confident and full of words. She attacked me with words, speaking quickly! Confusing my poor human brain in this land once again, speaking an incomprehensible language. But that did not interrupt our communication. It seemed like that was the conversation we should have had, before we allowed Hate to stain our hearts with black spots.

“It was a misunderstandment” my conscience screamed, as it was extremely alert, understanding her. “Hating her was a false cause” I explained to myself quietly. Her dark aura started to disappear, after her long inhuman mutters. There were moments of silence and a strangely-felt eye-contact, that was when we found a solution to our clash. As we smiled to each other, I felt a sense of ease and comfort. She closed her eyes tightly, forming a frown on her face, with her hands looking like they are grabbing an invisible object. Like a witch of energy, she embraced all negativity, it was like she intended to clear the forest from that one flaw in it’s perfection, she did it for me, she did it because I listened to her. She started to disappear, taking the space she filled away too. And disappearing delightfully, unlike her appearance.

“An unresolved quarrel!” I thought to myself, feeling extremely brilliant solving the mystery of why I was forbidden from my sanctuary in only a short duration.

I opened my eyes with a sigh of relief, and immediately knew which number to call after my journey.

*Dear reader, is forgiveness a way into indefinite relief? Please share your opinion.

© 2011 ALIA SULTAN

11 Comments

  1. If we can see forgiveness through your eyes, then definitely, it is inevitable. All the gates, then, shall be open to welcome us to realm you have created -Breath-taking!

  2. I see forgiveness as a kind of cure for our souls. It lightens the weight of hate, revenge and holding grudges. What magical things could come out of forgiveness, that is if we could offer. It may encounter as a hard thing to do, but with time you’ll know that it is your healer.

  3. I do think it is. It’s a peaceful way of letting go, replacing all those thoughts that consume the mind and the heart with purifying serenity. I’m not sure if it is an easy power to possess though, for one needs so much strength to master forgiveness. Once it’s gained, however, the soul reaches the peak of tranquillity.

    Amazing words Alia! Beyond beautiful.

  4. yes… forgiving someone is like helping decrease the negativity in your heart.. forgiving more of a blessing which we give… it’s not just about the verbal ‘sorry’… it’s about wishing he/she might not do that again and taking the same as a promise…
    and once again you’ve left me spellbound… it’s an amazing story… i hope you will write a novel soon.. 🙂
    Have a Great Day. till then ‘alhamdulillah’

    1. I agree with you. I’d define forgiveness as a heart purifier. As you said, it’s not just about the verbal “sorry”.
      Your comments are very uplifting! Thanks a lot.
      A great day for all of us InshAllah 🙂

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